I’ve had a few conversations with friends, where this question has come up. Usually, it is from me, because I’m honestly curious about what my stay-at-home peers do all day, especially the ones who no longer have babies to tend to. Oddly enough, the question brings about laughter and perhaps a touch of offense, as if merely asking the question is somehow degrading. No one as of yet really has told me what they do (and then I just end up wondering why; curiosity sure can be a curse).
So, I asked myself the question as a prompt. And the first thought that popped in my head was, “Some days, I don’t even know…” Somehow, I rise from bed in the morning, I blink, and then I’m pulling down the covers to get back into it. Rinse and repeat.
Now that I’m menopausal (I think, but at my age, 54, that road at times feels like it’s never going to reach its destination), and that five of my nine children are now adults, I have a much slower pace. Not on purpose, but probably more of a settledness (weariness?) that comes from almost three decades straight of stay-at-home mommying. I imagine this might be true of anyone doing any same thing for so long. Sometimes I dream of traveling with the last four of my children across the world just to do something different, but given that half of those children have Down syndrome and the youngest of them all is only six years old, my feet continue to be planted at home (yes, I was 48 years old when I had my last baby).
So what do I do all day? I’m going to exclude the millions of interruptions to all of what I do: the unceasing questions, the potty trainings, the clean ups, the problems with dogs/cats/chickens/whatever, the phone calls/texts/unexpected visitors, and the unceasing laundry buzzers. Just sprinkle those in as you read (are you tired yet?).
I’m usually up with the sun-ish, whatever time of year. Morning is a treasured alone time when I can prepare for my day and set my mind and my body aright, and for that reason I let my kids sleep in. “Sleeping in”, to my six year old, is 7:00 in the morning, after which his words flow nonstop until he goes to bed at night. So, sun-up it is for me! I take great care for the time I spend in the morning, calling them practices. I wrote a book on that topic, and many other women shared their own practices in it as well.
My current morning practices are to rise up and to freshen a little in the bathroom, checking my Oura app for how my sleep was (“optimal”) and for my readiness score (88). I drink a glass of water while preparing my large mug of herbal tea. Lately, I’ve been enjoying chamomile citrus green tea. Then, I sit with my big Bible, my pen, and Tabletalk magazine and read through all of the scriptures and lesson, perhaps take some notes, and pray through it and for the needs in and on my heart. It’s impossible to not be thankful to the Lord after reading His Word; that’s my experience, and sets my mind to start the day in a good (or better) place. Most days, I also do some journaling.
Then, feeling like it or not (because most often it’s “not”), I exercise, because I know (also from experience) that afterwards I will FEEL amazing due to all of that increased oxygen and blood flow. Currently, I do a few minutes of jump rope, then seven minutes of strength training from an app, then a challenging kettlebell circuit. The kettlebell is my absolute favorite! Afterwards, I will do a very brisk 1-2 mile walk or jog on the treadmill while watching some non-newsy YouTube.
By then I am ready for a shower and I listen to loud music that makes me happy, sometimes Christian and sometimes secular. I used to listen to news podcasts but I quit doing that as it didn’t help me to have a happy heart. I figured there would be time later in the day to get brought down with the sin and wickedness of the world, and it could wait at least until I was dressed. I take care of my face and sometimes will put on a little bit of makeup even I don’t plan to go anywhere, usually a herbal tint for my cheeks and eyes and lips. I try to dress in whatever makes me feel good and ready for the day, and pop my pedometer into my pocket (which I trust more than my Oura ring).
I make my bed. Because I really hate going into my bedroom throughout the day and having my bed yell at me that it’s a rushed and frumpy day and furthermore not a relaxing one. There’s a reason why it feels good to go to a hotel with a made up bed greeting you; it’s the promise of a clean, crisp, welcoming bed at the end of the day. That’s how I see it anyway: a promise of rest to come, not a reminder (over and over again) of a chore left undone.
Before I leave the room, I check for texts and group chat, answer if necessary, and enter into the day as I close my bedroom door. I am ready.
What do you do to get ready in the morning?
Are you offended I asked?
Good afternoon!
I’m not offended in the least by your question. I think being curious about others shows interest and is a good thing.
Today was NOT a typical day because my grandson stayed over. I don’t dare get up early when he’s here because he will get up then too. I live in a two story cape, but the stairs creek and Ezekiel is a light sleeper.
But typically I too rise early and enjoy a cup of tea (Earl Grey with a tsp of local honey). While the water heats up I put away the dishes from the night before and empty tea bags from the day before ( we use them in the gardens).
Then I sit at my desk, say prayers and quickly scan my phone for messages and prayer requests. Then open The Bible app and complete the day’s devotionals ( I have two that I’m doing. One alone (the Bible in 1yr) & one group study. By this time my husband is usually getting up and our day moves along. If he’s not I will journal or read. Or start laundry or bake or…. Something 😉